My Kingdom For A Brain Cell

This is not to be expected - a midweek special.

I just wanted to share my sense of utter exasperation for today. Although it comes with a sense of surprise and satisfaction too.

I've been doing up a bicycle for a friend. It's been hanging around on the To Do list for quite a while, and, as the summer has now passed, I thought it would be a good time to catch up a bit.

After having cleaned and polished and adjusted and inflated and what not, I was quite pleased everything was in good order. But then I couldn't seem to get the front gears to work. 'Bugger', I thought, 'Indexed gears. Hmmm. Well, I'll just have to give it a go.'

In the end I realised that the whole shifter was KO and would need replacing.

Now, Ayrshire prides itself on being very keen on cycling. There are cycle shops in most towns, including mine. In an emergency, there's even a Halfords.

So off I toddled to my local independent bike store, where I admired the packed displays and rows of interesting but unidentifiable gadgets, together with lots of neoprene and Lycra, and some very expensive bikes.

Now, I used to build my own bikes, back in the 1880s, so I do know a wee bit about bicycles, even though the whole twist-gripped-shock-absorbed-perforated-disc thing has passed me by.

Anyway, there I was standing in front of a slightly chubby young man who looked far more interested in his computer than in me. 'Can you help?' I asked. 'The barrel adjuster on this shifter has broken and I'm not sure the cam is working.' I handed him the offending lump.

'Um, you mean the while thing snapped off?'
'No - the barrel adjuster has broken off.'
'Oh.' [Goes in the back. Comes back a few seconds later]
'The barrel adjuster is broken and and I don't think the cam is working. I can't get another adjuster to fit. It's quite old.'
'Yesss. Well. You don't have any spares hanging about do you?'
'No.'
'OK, what can I do?'
'That's up to you.'
'What?'
'They come in pairs. Cost a bit.'

At which point I thanked him and left, walked across to Halfords and had a concise conversation with a sales assistant while he cycled round the aisles. (Really.)

'Yeah. I think you're screwed on that. Try Ebay.'

So I did. And I found an exact replacement in 2 minutes. Thank you Halfords.

And you won't hear that said very often.